A recent reawakening has happened, an old piece of my soul. A piece of me that I have known to remain silent, sleeping within my heart, my mind, my essence. Something that upon a recent act, a recent loss of faith that has allowed the gates to open. These gates were sealed when I had been doing lots of self work. The work that needed to repair the damaged inflicted in my youth. A beast, a creature, my dark self has reawakened and as in with the past I enjoy each minute of it.
When did it really hit, when at work I brought a cancer survivor to tears, edged on for more and enjoyed it. When the little eruptions of my past began to re-emerge. Little outburst, little hateful quips.
As in the past, the shields of protection have risen, the battle shields to inflict more damage then what can be received however with this reawakening has come some guidance. A self awareness buffer. Knowing the full damage that can be inflicted, the shame, hate, anger, pain I know that I must restrain myself.
No comments:
Post a Comment