Gotta Move

Last October I took a job that required 80% travel, since then the role has turned into 90-95% travel. Before that time period I've left Buffalo only once since returning home in 2003.

Being shipped off around the country like cattle puts things into a certain perspective. It's the big bad machine in control of your life to a whole new degree. You miss family, you miss friends, you miss events because you have to be somewhere else.

So what does this mean for me? I'm miserable in this role, the travel has become excessive, and I've lost my eloquence. My coworkers are not at the intellectual level that I once was at. I'm not saying I'm a genius but I could hold an intelligent conversation. I've been "hoodied". My new favorite sayings are "Oh you a (fill in the blank) HUH?", "what it do?" and "who it be?".

This job also puts relationships into perspective. A lot of coworkers date or sleep with coworkers, most people at home with family are weeded out early because of kids. People who don't put their relationships before their work lose them.



At one point in time I believed in The Secret and believed and practiced the Message of Water by Dr Masaru Emoto who is a man I have seen present live and met briefly. I listened to the Mother Planet, worked to aid her health. I felt one with the world, the universe. The sight of an animal was a word of wisdom, advice traveled on a breeze.

But that is gone or is it. A breeze came over me just the other day, with a whisper ever so quiet...it's time to change. What is life other then a constant struggle, a constant change that we humans fight against. Fear of the unknown is great and in our evolved form we work strongly against that natural force.

I have become complacent in my life in Buffalo and although I have met many people along the way, over all I have only digressed into a life and person that I was before I had left Buffalo. I've become bound by a steel-jaw leg hold trap set by my parents to live in the misery they have filled their lives with. I have friends that have seem to become complacent with their lives in this city.

I have friends that no longer make me become a better person that I am today. They do not seek to challenge me, force me to grow and develop. I'm not saying that you should end all friendships because they don't make you develop but are they holding me back? Or is it even worse, am I going through a de-evolution?

Go with your gut, listen to your heart, you will understand....that's right Grandmother Willow we should all be listening to you.

It's time, it's time for things to happen......

"I want magic carpets, I want true romance
I want moonlight cruises to the South of France
And I want kisses that go on for days
I want more than this is in so many ways
I want more full-filling
I want equal billing
I want champagne chilling at the door
So, in short, I'm saying if you want me
I want more!"